It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
