Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize
