I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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