He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
