I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
