Girls should come with a carfax report
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
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