you didnt know i had herpes?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
