It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
