no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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