She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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