I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize