i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Nobody cheats on THIS.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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