i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
