ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize