Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
