He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
