It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
