You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
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Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
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his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.