Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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