I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
There's always time for handjobs
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
