I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
