Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize