Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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