I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
