I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I will be naked everywhere
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
