Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Randomize
