its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I got inside last night via doggy door
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
