You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Randomize
