he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Randomize
