...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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