so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
