The beer is more important than you right now.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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