i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
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I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
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he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
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