this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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