Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
