The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
