perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
worst night to have a conscience
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
