What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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