i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
