I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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