At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
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You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
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you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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