You smell like stripper and shame
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
