Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
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