You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
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