I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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