im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
