I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Randomize
