You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
