I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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