On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
you would pick up someone in the library
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
