whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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