I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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