he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize